It's Not Personal, It's Personality
Kent R.
We have a long-term client who likes to joke that, for a decade, she was convinced her husband hated her. She then learned he’s an extrovert and she’s an introvert, dove into the details of what exactly that means, and let the decade of worry melt away.
I know. It’s actually not something to joke about. And she’ll say the same thing. That decade that she can (um, now) have a laugh over, contained some serious rough patches. Painful periods of disconnect during which both partners questioned what the hell was going on in their marriage and – at the lowest of points – why they were even married.
But this kind of thing is quite common. In the work we do, we regularly work with clients who are struggling in a relationship with their spouse, parent, boss, etc. Clashes that, on the surface, seem very personal but that, in reality, usually aren’t personal at all. They’re about personality.